Chapter 16 | Page 7b: Cows for Alarm

Transcript

Evil Inc – March 13, 2025

Panel 1:
(Narration box:)
The following morning finds Angus in North Fairmount, stocking a safehouse at the request of his employer, the Lethal Librarian…

Angus:
Good morning, ma’am.

Mrs. Elliot:
Now I’ve seen everything! A TALKING COW!

Panel 2:
Angus (clears throat):
Ahem—I am a minotaur, ma’am.

Panel 3:
Mrs. Elliot:
Don’t you go stomping around in there! I have Hummels in the china closet!

Panel 4:
Angus (hesitant):
I… don’t… stomp…

Mrs. Elliot:
You’re brown. Does that mean you give chocolate milk?

Panel 5:
Angus:
That’s a myth, ma’am.

Mrs. Elliot:
Ok… So put me down for a quart of regular and a pint of heavy cream.

Panel 6:
(Angus stomps his hoof in frustration, making a loud THUMP sound.)

Angus (shouting):
I AM NOT A COW!

(A small sound comes from the background: Tinkle.)

Panel 7:
Mrs. Elliot (smirking):
If that’s the little girl feeding ducks, you’re in deep manure, bossy.

Courting Disaster: Aug. 10, 2007

Courting Disaster


Courting Disaster, my weekly comic about sex, love, and relationships updates every Friday. You’ll laugh your pants off.

This week’s question:

Q: I married a woman last year whom I’d loved in high school. Previously, she was married to a guy who later walked out on her, her two sons and infant daughter. But in the last year I have grown increasingly depressed. I love her children, but I feel that I am just a live-in babysitter. We have tried to have a child together, but no luck. I miss being single and resent the fact that I have contributed thousands of dollars to get my wife out of debt using money I had set aside for an early retirement. I believed the woman I married was the same girl I loved so much in our teen years. That is not the case. I want to end this now because I have lost so much hope. At times I am in physical pain because I am miserably depressed and know I made a horrible mistake. My dilemma is that I do not want to hurt her again, or her children. She is a wonderful person. I think people will look down on me and think I am just as low as her ex-husband if I leave her. Yet I feel my life is over if I stay in this relationship. I think she loves me, but I also think she knew that if we married, her financial nightmare would end, which it did. Can you help?

Go on over and offer some advice.