Transcript
Evil Inc – March 13, 2025
Panel 1:
(Narration box:)
The following morning finds Angus in North Fairmount, stocking a safehouse at the request of his employer, the Lethal Librarian…
Angus:
Good morning, ma’am.
Mrs. Elliot:
Now I’ve seen everything! A TALKING COW!
Panel 2:
Angus (clears throat):
Ahem—I am a minotaur, ma’am.
Panel 3:
Mrs. Elliot:
Don’t you go stomping around in there! I have Hummels in the china closet!
Panel 4:
Angus (hesitant):
I… don’t… stomp…
Mrs. Elliot:
You’re brown. Does that mean you give chocolate milk?
Panel 5:
Angus:
That’s a myth, ma’am.
Mrs. Elliot:
Ok… So put me down for a quart of regular and a pint of heavy cream.
Panel 6:
(Angus stomps his hoof in frustration, making a loud THUMP sound.)
Angus (shouting):
I AM NOT A COW!
(A small sound comes from the background: Tinkle.)
Panel 7:
Mrs. Elliot (smirking):
If that’s the little girl feeding ducks, you’re in deep manure, bossy.
Archive: Simon’s Sausage
Hee’s one from the archives that I stumbled over yesterday. It’s a cartoon that I did for the
Philadelphia Daily News in 2003.
The story was this: A baseball player, playfully batting at a mascot doing a race on the field, acidentally tripped the mascot, hurting the woman inside the costume.
[ESPN]
Pittsburgh first baseman Randall Simon was questioned by sheriff’s officers after hitting one of the Milwaukee Brewers’ sausage mascots with his bat during a game… “That wasn’t my intention in my heart for that to happen,” he said before Thursday’s Brewers-Pirates game. “I was just trying to get a tap at the costume and for her to finish the race.”
